DAY OUT: Van Gogh Immersive Experience (Leicester)

 

Our first real visit to Leicester in a long time, and once again it was blisteringly warm. But we had tickets for the Van Gogh Immersive Experience, so we had to go.... just as well really since otherwise we would have just sat on the sofa moaning about how hot we were. But even so. It was not much fun walking around outside, which thankfully we didn't have to do too much.

We got into Leicester a bit early and had a look around the Highcross centre (now with lots of empty shops it seems), visited the TAG Heuer boutique (which has apparently been there for 3 years!) and bought a toilet-roll holder from John Lewis. No one can say we don't know how to party.

The Van Gogh experience was situated in a church just behind the John Lewis car park and actually it was pretty good. I never realised that he had killed himself in his 30s, or that he was colour blind - which seemingly explains his overuse of very vivid colours. It was quite small though, and us being us we managed to cock it up, entering the main 'experience' before we'd finished one side of the church and then having to traipse back through the middle after we'd done the other side as there was no other way back!

The actual film/experience was good, although at the start (or rather the part where we joined it) it seemed like not much was happening. But once you watch the whole thing it kinda makes more sense. It was quite pleasant, and if the seats had been more comfortable I could have happily sat through the whole thing again. But alas the comfy looking sofa we descended on turned out not to be as comfy as we thought.

After this bit we flitted past the 'Create Your Own Masterpiece' by colouring in one of Vincent's paintings... because we're not 5 years old. Though saying that there were a couple who were older than us gleefully 'joining in' like utter retards....

There was an optional VR experience and for me this was the highlight of the whole thing, it really brought the pictures to life and it was very clever how they made it so you could turn around inside the paintings, especially the street scenes. Also the wide open corn fields and the closed in forests worked really well - I would definitely recommend doing this, and it was only an extra £3 each.

After that it was a case of 'exit through the gift shop' (after we'd gone back through the middle and watched a short documentary of course) and then back out into the miserable 28 degree heat.

DAY OUT: London

 

Today we were supposed to be visiting the Banksy exhibition in Regent Street, and as we were going down to London anyway we bought tickets to the Kusama 'Infinity Rooms' exhibition at the Tate too. Unfortunately, the Banksy exhibition was delayed, so we were stuck with tickets to the other exhibition with a timed entry of 4:45pm! Which wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't coincided with a heat wave... again.

We debated over which train station to go to to minimise the time on the train, but it seemed the time spent in the car versus the time saved wasn't really worth it for MK, Leighton Buzzard or Bletchley, plus any motorway delay could cock things right up so in the end we elected to go to Rugby instead...

Just as well because it seems there was some disruption to Northampton-Milton Keynes services with busses being used for the last part of the journey. No thanks to that!

Finding the entrance to the multi-storey car park proved difficult, but fortunately there was another car park just past the station which had plenty of spaces left. I parked as close to a tree as I could though I doubt it would have made any difference had we returned in the middle of the day.

We trundled off to the station and oddly met our ex-next door neighbour on the platform. We had to sit apart on the first part of the journey as the train was quite full, but at Milton Keynes we managed to move to sit together again.

We got to London at about 10:30 and headed off to Covent Garden via Leicester Square tube to visit the Oakley Vault. I wanted to try some Batwolf shades on but was told they had been discontinued. I immediately picked up some very cool 'Heliostat' shades in a black/grey camo pattern and then found a slightly cooler pair called 'Turbine Rotor' but which they only had in shiny black. Fortunately the Oakley website allows you to customise your shades so it is possible to order the Turbine Rotors in the matt camo finish. Sweet.

Next we headed back through Leicester Square and off to Watches of Switzerland in Regent Street. Incredibly this was the first time we had ever been upstairs, although the selection of pre-owned watches was rather small and Rolex heavy. Was amused to see a used steel Nautilus for £99,000 though, and a gold one for £140,000! I tried on a cool Ulysee Nardin Limited Edition here and also the WOS Aquaracer, which looks better in person than photos suggest. 

Then we headed off to Avery Row (via the backstreet, which thankfully gave a good amount of shade from the blazing sun). We marvelled at the enormous queue outside for the 'Salad Kitchen' - how can it be so popular, it's just salad after all! The watch I'd asked to see hadn't arrived yet and they said they would ring us when it did and hopefully we would be able to come back. We had planned to go to lunch after this and even though it was earlier than we thought we stuck to the plan and walked along Brook Street, past Grosvenor Square, along Upper Brook Street and then up the main road to Cumberland Gate.

The SOUND Cafe was once again excellent. We had the same meal as last time (Fried Chicken Burger) and it was perfect. We had three diet Cokes each (free refills - yay!) and then topped it off by sharing a vanilla cheesecake with strawberries and strawberry sauce. Wonderful.

Unlike last time we were sat on the raised bar section of the floor and we kept seeing this serving robot whizzing around. Our waitress told us it is called 'Bella' and it was very amusing to see it jigging around the place and also once it stopped at a table and the people sitting there tried to take the food off it but it kept moving around. Then the waitress came and pressed the big red button on the top which makes it stand still... good job they didn't drop their food, that would have been awkward!

We stayed at the SOUND Cafe a good while, praying for the clouds to descend, but eventually we realised that sooner or later we would have to go out in the sun, so we donned hats and smothered ourselves in sun cream and made our way back to Watchfinder (Juliette had rung as promised - while I was trying to pay the bill).

Ultimately the watch was rather disappointing and we headed off again to Bond Street tube to go to Southwalk and Tate Modern. 

There is undoubtedly a lot of shit in the Tate Modern. I think how much you enjoy it probably depends on your mood on the day (and perhaps how sweaty you are). We raced around the whole thing in about an hour, largely unimpressed but finding occasional high points. Some of which are sillier than others...

Kudos to the artist who came up with this one, I mean.... you gotta have some balls to present that and manage not to laugh when it's accepted as proper 'art'.

I'd love to see something like this being 'installed'. I bet they have endless meetings about it and it probably needs a team of highly paid people to oversee.... it feels like Barry Flanagan was really taking the piss. In fact Barry Flanagan sounds like nothing more than a 'builder'. 

I quite liked this, though it didn't immediately speak to me of the decaying Moroccan ecology, but there you go. Yto Barrada also had a film on display which was my highlight of the day. Unfortunately I can't find it on the internet, which is a shame...

There was something almost David Lynchesque about this short film, I really liked it... the music really added to the pompousness of the whole thing. 

Nice to see that Cildo Meireles 'Babel' is still at the Tate, definitely one of the coolest things in the place. 

Having a little while to wait until our allotted ticket time we took the lift up to the 10th floor and the viewing platform, the breeze up there was very refreshing and the views over London quite spectacular (and also free, unlike the Shard!).

And so finally we headed downstairs to the Kusama exhibition, the whole reason we had come to London on this stinking hot day. And... well, to be honest it wasn't all that amazing. Hard to believe it was completely sold out, but I guess a lot of other people got suckered in by the advert too! 

When you first go on there is a room explaining Kusama's history (she's 94 years old now and still living in a hospital where she admitted herself in the 1970s due to hallucinations)... this was quite interesting. Then in the next room there was a box on a plinth which you look into and it is like a miniature 'Infinity Room'... 

Then you head into the main room and there were two 'rooms' which you had to queue for. When you got to the front of the queue there were signs saying that it might make you feel dizzy and if you want to be let out of the room before the 2 minutes (or whatever) were up then knock on the door. 

Truth be told, the first room wasn't that exciting. At all. There was a chandelier in a glass case and the room was clad in mirrors around the sides (I think it was octagonal in shape), but it really wasn't that impressive or spectacular. Underwhelmed we queued for the other room, which was better... but still not really that memorable or awe inspiring.

 I don't know. It seemed to me like a good 'idea' that didn't really follow through in execution. Maybe it would have been better if it wasn't so brightly lit, or maybe if the colours faded from one shade to another... it lacked atmosphere, and the very brief time allowed didn't help much either. It felt like someone opening a door and shouting 'LOOK AT THIS, QUICKLY!' then slamming it shut again. On the other hand I guess it has to be that way because there were so many people queueing to see it.

I inadvertently made my own 'artwork' by moving my phone while I was trying to take a photo. Would it be too harsh to say I think mine is better? 

While we were queueing for the second room there was a video projecting on the wall, showing Kusama trying to be weird. She had a ladder that she had attached shoes to and then she was lying half naked on a bed of something that I couldn't quite work out what it was... it didn't seem very convincing though. It was like something an art student would do to try and be like Dali.

If only we had read this brilliant REVIEW before we decided to go...

Anyway, that was the end of that... and we headed out into the cool air just outside the Tate. Oddly it was quite cool, it seemed because the buildings all around were so tall that this tiny bit of London didn't get any sun at all. It didn't last long of course and we were soon sweating again as we made our way to a bar to rest our weary feet before making the journey back to Euston. 

Blackfriars road had several hotels with bars, and we plumped for the Novotel, which was okay. I mean the seats weren't the most comfortable and when the barman tried to serve diet Cokes we just got slightly brown water, so we had to wait for him to go and change the barrel. 

We sat in there, trying to work out the train times on my phone, feeling very hot and grumpy and it was definitely time to go home. We baulked at the first train from Southwark to Waterloo, but had to get on the second one even though it was standing room only. Time was ticking away and we wondered if we would actually make the train, thankfully we made it with 3:43 to spare... and again we had to sit apart for the first part of the journey but at least it was less than an hour in total.

DAY OUT: Shropshire Sculpture Park

 

On the face of it, this should have been great. There were plenty of sculptures and the weather wasn't too hot, and yet.... somehow the park managed to remove any semblance of fun from the visit with their constant preaching. It starts at the main entrance, 'Oh look, there's an enormous Trans Former....', with a Ukraine flag. Okay. Then on the way up the drive we see a sculpture of Kim Jong Il riding a nuclear missile which is kinda fun, except you can't look at it without being assailed by banners demanding 'NO WAR' and decrying the number of dictatorships in the world.

Thankfully they couldn't find anything preachy to say about the cool Terminator crouching on a car further up the drive, but rest assured this was but a temporary respite. No sooner do you get past the three headed dragon made to celebrate King Charles' coronation than you come across a massive 'Iron Man' with a sign saying 'STOP OVER CONSUMING'. Oh do fuck off.

Truth be told most of the best stuff is situated along the drive on the way in, so if you really wanted to you could just drive in, turn around at the top and drive out again, this will avoid you having to pay or having to visit the thoroughly depressing 'Extinction Trail'. Apparently even the organisers realise this is quite depressing, so they pepper it with Minions and a solitary M&M man (red in case you were wondering).

Seriously though, we know animals are in danger on every continent, but constantly slapping me round the face with it from the moment I arrive to the moment I leave isn't making for a fun day. Of course, it's not all dying animals, there is a surfeit of dragons... who, let's not forget aren't extinct because they never existed in the first place. 

NO. 

THEY REALLY DIDN'T.

Admittedly some of the sculptures are really impressive, the giant mecha-Gorilla is one example, and I'm sure a lot of people will enjoy all the Marvel characters. But the thing is, there's no sense of discovery. When you visit the Yorkshire Sculpture Park each exhibit has it's own space and you need to walk between them. Here it's like a 'Sculpture Wharehouse', three dragons for £5000 and we'll throw in a 20ft high Darth Vader holding a sign warning against AI.

I did like the Alien mirror though, that was very cool and the real horse cuddling up to a steel one was very cute. But the shop was rammed with tat, and even when we did find something that was actually quite nice (a flat steel cut-out of a cat) it was reduced from £150 to only £99! I mean, it was nice and for £20 I might even have bought one.... but ninety-nine pounds? Do me a favour.

A rare moment of humour in this rather humourless place!

As if they hadn't already depressed us enough, they then scattered 'NO PICNICS' signs across every bench. Because, they say, they need the revenue from the cafe to keep going. Fair enough in the winter when they don't charge to enter, but right now the place was packed with people chucking £7.50 at them and paying £3 to park. Presumably somebody buys a £99 wall cat every now and again too. 

The Allegedly 'World Famous' Spoon Gorilla... 

And the 'World Famous Knife Angel' was nowhere to be seen. Having wandered around the whole thing we asked at the information desk only to be told it was currently on tour in 'Harlow'. Brilliant. There was a box to put any unwanted guns in though, a pity I forgot to bring my Uzi 9mm, I rarely use that these days. Oh and the spoon Gorilla. Not nearly as impressive as it sounds. It's got nothing on Joana Vascenselos' saucepan lid shoes, that's for sure. 

I think what was missing was any semblance of 'art'. Unlike the other sculpture parks we've been to, everything is very literal. Here's a dragon, here's a giraffe, here's 400 deer... here's Iron Man, here's the Hulk, here's another dragon. And gorillas... why so many gorillas? At least the Terminator looked like it was animated, most of the sculptures looked very static and unexciting.

Still, the Trip Advisor reviewers seem to be universally positive so clearly we are just miserable cunts. Maybe no one else actually bothered to read all the preachy nonsense, they were probably too busy making straight for the cafe, just past the enormous portrait of Roger Moore as James Bond (for no apparent reason). Still, all in all, I'd have to say it was still a lot better than Bolsover Castle, which remains the least interesting 'day out' of all time.