MEAL OUT: Fox and Hounds (Exton)

Our latest foray into the wilds of Rutlandshire proved to be a tad challenging. Unfortunately when they booked Su had looked at the lunch menu which featured normal food like Shepherds Pie, but when we arrived we were a little disheartened to find ourselves presented with the menu below.

Jus we can swallow, watermelon caviar we can just about stomach, but when you find yourself reading a menu and one of the dishes features 'pork air' you really need to laugh in their pretentious fucking faces.

At least there was steak, albeit a fatty cut of steak otherwise known as ribeye. Actually that wasn't too bad and the pepper sauce made it better. The chips were okay, but serving salt and pepper in bowls with a tiny spoon is the work of utter, utter cunts. What the fuck are you supposed to do with unground sea-salt exactly? I tried, I thought 'lumps of salt are better than no salt', but it was a complete fail, as the salt lumps bypassed the chips completely and collected on the plate.

And the puddings, oh the puddings... leaving aside the sorbets and ice cream, everything on the menu was maximum-wank-turbo. Expressions of gooseberry or some such bilge...

But all this paled into insignificance when the news broke that there was no 'New Zealand Sauv' available, not even for ready money. Tables were overturned and paintings were torn from the walls while the impossibly tiny waitress cowered in the corner wishing she gone to a college or become a prostitute instead.

Still, to be fair it wasn't the worst meal we've ever had out and the place had a bizarre old world charm, including the most wax infused candelabra we'd ever seen sitting on a bar.

Fortunately we still had a good night with Lee and Su, which is what really matters at the end of the day.

MEAL OUT: The Red Lion (Gilmorton)

We thought we'd give the other 'posh' pub in Gilmorton a go for a change and though it has to be said the place isn't quite as plush as the website suggests it might be, it was a very nice meal. It's a curious mixture, somewhere between the Grey Goose and a local boozer. Some of the tables were a bit chipped around the edges, and the seats were a bit hard (felt like mine had a sheet of wood under the cover or something) but regardless we couldn't fault the service or the meal.

I had a lovely chargrilled burger and Rose had the duck with mashed potato. For pud I had the sticky toffee pudding, which was different again from anywhere else, resembling more a sort of treacle sponge, lighter than a usual STP, but very nice all the same. Probably should have gone with the custard rather than ice cream. Rose had a strawberry sunday (sans cream) which had some spectacular pieces of chocolate brownie in, definitely be having brownies next time we go there I think!

DAY OUT: London / Cartier in Motion

We had everything planned to the last detail, get the 8:25 train to London, straight to the Design Museum for the Cartier exhibition, then off to Richoux for an early lunch then into the centre for the shops and possibly a piece of carrot cake in the other Richoux before we came home.

And then I found out about the London Pride march, which meant we would be hitting Regent Street at about the same time as 750,000 other people. So a rethink was in order. We still got the 8:25 train, but instead of heading to Kensington, we went to Leicester Square instead and then walked up Regent Street and got to Kate Spade just before it opened.

From Kate Spade we walked up to Oxford Street and along to Selfridges where we spent a good little while in the Wonder Room and saw some cool watches, including a ceramic Audemars Piguet Concept Watch and also some cool TAGs (camo Aquaracer, Diamond Bezel Carrera Tourbillon and the new Autavia).

From here we wandered down Bond Street, looking in the windows at some very cool watches (including MB&F, Ressence, Grubel Forsey and Urwerk) and also popped into the very posh Breitling boutique to try on the new 45mm Avenger Hurricane, which was very cool but at £7100 it's unlikely to ever come into my possession.

A nice surprise as we walked down Bond Street was coming across the Charbonel et Walker shop, which we didn't know was there. We bought a selection and then having tried the Billionaires Shortcake we went straight back in and bought a box of eight (a steal at just £14.50!).

We walked down to our regular Richoux on Piccadily, only to find the doors open and the place ripped to bits. Great, closed for refitting! So we fell back on plan B (or was it actually Plan A) and took the tube to Gloucester Rd, where we happened to know there was another Richoux.

After lunch (and carrot cake) we headed off to the Design Museum via Kensington High Street (where we saw the slightly bizarre sight of a man walking down the street eating a Terry's Chocolate Orange) where we spent probably an hour at the 'Cartier in Motion' exhibition. Not only was this very good, but it was FREE! As such we felt okay about paying £3.50 each for a diet Coke in the funky Museum cafe (the posh one upstairs, not the shitty one downstairs - that's for the plebs).

(We particularly liked Alberto Santos-Dumont's very tall dining chairs and table)

Time was flying by and so we took the tube back round the Circle line (avoiding the whole Oxford Circus malarky), changed at Victoria and just caught the 4:55pm train home. Perfect!

GIG: Cyferdyne (Sheffield)

Following some bizarre misdirection from our Satnav, which took us through Chesterfield to get to Sheffield, we arrived (surprisingly) only a few minutes later than expected and caught the tail end of 'Future Perfect's' set. They sounded okay, but as I thought when I listened to them on youtube - potentially one dimensional.

It was pretty hot in the Corporation (second room) tonight, but is it ever not in this room? It seemed reasonably sparse in there to begin with but as Cyferdyne set up people started to appear and it became less sparse.... and hotter. Needless to say the tallest man in the world arrived and stood in front of me, but he did keep moving about so it wasn't so bad.

Cyferdyne were (as usual) slightly shambolic, but enjoyable, though I have to say I think they were better in Lancaster earlier in the year. Lots of smelly people in attendance, which I could do without and one girl walking around with her tits out, which I didn't even notice until Rose pointed it out...

Rather amusing watching other people notice and stare, like the tallest man in the world for instance. Supping his pint while the word 'Boooobies' ran through his brain.

Cyferdyne played a couple of new songs, 'Breathing' sounded very good, lets hope they get the album out soon.. and if someone could tell the singer that playing a gig in your Adidas trackie bottoms is not cool, that would be, er, cool.

Cyferdyne finished their set with a cover of Example's 'Changed the Way You Kissed Me'. Neither of us knew it, but having Googled it, damn if that isn't the blackest sounding white guy on the planet!

As the set drew to a close there seemed to be more and more dry ice being pumped into the venue, which made taking the 'end of set' photo a little difficult, but they did it anyway... however, it didn't exactly turn out great.