GIG: Speak and Spell (Derby)

It was seriously hot today, but thankfully The Flowerpot had some decent air-conditioning. I dread to think what this would have been like otherwise as the place was absolutely rammed. The band were good, but they seemed a bit random at times, and a bit too keen on extending things for no good reason. But I couldn't fault the setlist, Blasphemous Rumours, Walking in My Shoes, Enjoy the Silence, Shake the Disease... the only song that was missing for me was 'In My Room', but that was a minor quibble.

SHOPPING: MK Centre (Milton Keynes)

Our busy week continued with a trip to the MK Centre, which was more productive for more than for Rose. I managed to snag a half price Rocha John Rocha John Rocha shirt and a pair of Red Herring shorts which (as always seems to be the case in Debenhams) went through the til 20% cheaper than the label advised. Result.

I also visited several watch shops and tried on both the new Red Bull Heuer 01 and the new white dial Aquaracer Calibre 5. I spent quite a long time in the Goldsmiths chatting with the guy (who was refreshingly knowledgeable about the TAGs he was selling) and we seemed to agree on most things. He said they were the second place in the country to get the Red Bull Carrera, and though I took it with a pinch of salt, they did have Rich's Tudor Pelagos LHD in there, so it must be place to be!

The journey there was 75m (going through Northampton) and the journey back was 75m (up the M1) so it really didn't make any difference.

Rose's day was more frustrating than mine, but I cheered her up when we got home with a Jo Malone Grapefruit Body Creme surprise.

HOLIDAY: Down Hall Country House Hotel / Cambridge

We decided to call into Cambridge on our way to stay at Down Hall Country House Hotel, and it was... alright. It was rather too hot for our liking, but it was June I suppose. We wandered a bit, got accosted by a man selling punting trips and then got him to show us where the tourist info office was. Once inside we learned he was an illegal tout and bought our tickets from there instead. When we left he was waiting for us outside, but we told him we'd decided to take a bus trip instead.

So we made our way to the riverside, only to be told there was a thirty minute wait. So we looked around and there was a pub behind us so we went in there and bought a diet Coke. £2.40 for a glass full of ice and about 100ml of Coke (if that). Total con. Still, at least we got to use the loos.

Then it was off on the punt. 11 of us, 2 Chinese, 2 Yanks (1 wearing a two-tone TAG Heuer Aquaracer), a family of three Italians and a couple of Indian kids. Oh and us of course, the British contingent. It was quite nice, a bit hot, but a pleasant way to spend 50mins. We saw several of the colleges from the river, accompanied by a moderately entertaining commentary from the punter, who wasn't getting any feedback from the passengers at all - thankfully he wasn't anticipating a collection!

After we got off the punt, we mooched around a bit and had our sandwiches on a bench while we chuckled at some clueless kids in a punt meandering from one side of the river to the other. Perhaps it's harder than it looks?

Then we walked down by the river a bit, but quickly came to a road and walked back the way we'd came towards the centre of the town. We tried to find Hotel Chocolat but quickly realised our map was utterly useless, and it was so flipping hot we decided to give it up and get off to the hotel.

Returning to the Park Street Car Park (via the strange and disturbing public toilets) we were overjoyed to discover that we had (quite by chance) made it back to the car within the four hour window, after which the egregious charge of £8 rose to a terrifyingly outrageous £17. Seventeen pounds for four hours and one minute of parking. Ridiculous is all I have to say about that. No wonder there were plenty of spaces...

Down Hall Country House and Hotel was lovely, and very big! Our rooms were described on Booking.com as 'compact', but they were anything but. We had a massive bed, two chairs and a lovely view over the garden.

The bathroom was pretty massive as well, with twin sinks and a bidet (which we didn't use).

I was quite happy to sit down and read for a bit, but Rose was clearly restless, so we went to the gym and did half an hour on the treadmill and then I did ten minutes on a Concept 2 PM4 rower, which was great!

We wanted to eat from the bar menu, but the restaurant looked much nicer (the tables in the bar were hopeless for eating), so we retired to the terrace to think it over. And then realised we could order the bar menu and eat on the terrace - so that's what we did. Two burgers and chips later, we were very stuffed... too stuffed for a pudding, but we did manage a 'Sex on the Beach' cocktail each. Lovely!

We went back to the room and watched First Dates, then crashed out. Very comfy bed, but the room was a little bit warm (should have opened the window) and the pillows were a bit hopeless. One was too thin, two was too thick... story of my life.

In the morning we had breakfast (included in the room rate), it was pretty indifferent to be honest. The Full English looked better but we didn't fancy it. So we had our cereals and packed up our stuff. About an hour later we arrived at Wimpole Hall, which had everything going against it from the off, but managed to win us over.

It was bloomin' hot and our enthusiasm for the walled garden was limited. Seriously, what is it about walled gardens, they are always half-arsed and half-empty, with lots of dying plants scattered about and vegetable patches that are as exciting to look at as an empty road.

We wandered along to the farm, which was okay. There was some very noisy pigs, some cute goats, some very still horses (a bit weird)... chickens I suppose, and... some Shetland ponies, some proper ponies and some sheep (though we couldn't see them for the squads of kids bleating in their faces).

We wandered off again, but it was too hot to walk very far and we headed back to the house. The formal gardens at the rear of the house were... well pretty unexciting to be honest, and at this point the general feeling was 'if the house doesn't kick some butt then this has been a bit shit'.

Thnakfully, the house was perfect, not too big, not too small, not a ruin, and with just enough cool features to keep your interest. The front aspect was pretty impressive for a start.

Inside we learned that the house had been given to the National Trust upon the death of the daughter of Rudyard Kipling who had bought the house with her husband just after the Second World War. He unfortunately died fairly soon and she spent the rest of her life (until 1979) restoring the property.

This door is fake (see the painted door handle in the photograph below)

This bed was sold at some point but was tracked down and brought back to Wimpole Hall as part of the restorations. Quite a statement piece!

The Chapel was probably the most impressive of all the rooms, with incredible trompe l'oeil paintings on all the walls and the ceiling. It was nice and cool in the house as well, which was a blessed relief, because it was roasting outside. Thankfully we parked under a tree so the car wasn't too bad when we got back in, and we had a decent run home too.

SHOPPING: McArthur Glen Outlet (Mansfield)

It's been a while since we've been to the Mansfield outlet and after the first ten minutes I was thinking, 'this is going to be a quick visit'. But it didn't turn out that way in the end. Indeed we ended up staying for over two hours and snapping up bargains left, right and centre.

A hoodie from Superdry, who knew they even made hoodies in my size - I'm sure they never used to. Twelve refill candle thingies from 'Yankee Candle', some books, a saucepan (but not the first one we saw which was a bloody ridiculous £27 complete with a lid we neither needed nor wanted), some nail varnish, emery boards, some work tops for Rose from M&S and these beauties from Nike.

Ye gads, my eyes! So bright even the camera can't cope with them.

And the 'stealth' version, totally amazeballs. What a great time we had, it's been a great holiday so far.

GIG: Neonsol (Manchester)

Google Aatma Manchester and you get a picture of a posh looking place in Stevenson Square. But in truth, the door to the venue is around the corner, down a dark alley, and up some steep, slippery stairs. In short, it's a bit of a shithole. But even so, tonight's event was well attended and pretty good all round.

We missed Vieon, but arrived just in time to see Def Neon sound checking. There was a dude who looked like Gene Simmons circa 1992 (with a dash of Dimebag Darrel thrown in) and a very short blond girl with a Rickenbacker bass that looked hilariously big on her. As I recall those things are fucking heavy as well, so she must be made of solid stuff!

The music, OMG, the music. Imagine if Celldweller did a side-project with Pikachu... Analogue Trash describe the band as sounding like 'Peaches' mixed with 'Van Halen', I don't know what 'Peaches' sounds like, but the VH bit is definitely valid.

It could easily have been fucking annoying, but in actual fact it grew on us... although some of the songs seemed to go on way longer than they should have.

Next up was Advance, and the Scottish band continue to waver (in my honest opinion). The first album is great stuff, but everything since has disappointed me and the new songs I heard tonight are not filling me with high hopes. I guess we'll have to wait and see when the album comes out, but it grated slightly that I only knew about three or four songs out of the whole set, especially when there's a whole album of great songs they could have played.

Tom streamed the gig on Facebook (as people are wont to do these days), which is fine, although I can't help thinking maybe a little more time could have been spent on learning the lyrics to new songs rather than reading them off pieces of paper. Or just play the (great) songs you already know!

I've seen Advance three times now, and each time has been less good than the last. It's a shame because the first time was a fantastic surprise. Thankfully Neonsol saved the day.

They too played quite a lot of new songs, but for the most part they were quite promising, although 'How Much Heat Can You Take' is most definitely not. I think they've changed the vocal emphasis on that one as well, or if they haven't I've got a better idea if they want it!

Easily the best band of the night, despite the obligatory technical difficulties (I don't know why electro bands have so many tech problems, they generally have less mics and leads than Metal bands), Neonsol played a good chunk of the debut album, alongside 'Another Day' from the Analogue Trash sampler, and a slew of new ones. Rose was slightly disappointed they didn't play 'Black Sunday' and I would have liked to hear 'Sonus Solis' and 'Road to War', but I guess those songs are probably not going to get much stage time in the future as they don't have any conventional vocals.

Ah well, we each got a Neonsol T-shirt, and rocked our glowstick bracelets, before leaving the crowd to enjoy the rest of the night. 3AM - I don't think so. And what a bunch they were... leaving aside the stick thin transvestite, there was that guy with the lopsided hair who was at the Cyferdyne show in Lancaster, a tattoo'd lady who danced all night in slow motion, and best of all, the guy who looks like Krusher Joule and dances like an absolute spastic. There were signs on the wall warning that strobe lights may be used during the performance, and you'd have to say it wouldn't be a surprise to find out he was epileptic.

Walking back across Manchester post midnight was fun, pissed up people everywhere and a plethora of girls wearing dresses three sizes too small... not that they cared, bless em!

Oh, and lesson learned, never think of buying Strepsils from a service station, you simply can't afford them - and next time look in the glove box before buying Halls as a substitute. That was a double fail indeed.